It took a full week of home schooling, but on the sixth day Ella made it through all five subjects with nary a tear in sight. Last week's crying was sponsored by:
- Math (double digit addition)
- Math (double digit subtraction)
- Mom's inability to find seeds anywhere to do the "make something grow!" science experiment (yes, I actually do understand planting season ended long ago, Mr. Home Depot employee. But science is for all seasons apparently! And also I didn't open up the teacher's guide and find out about the needed seeds until class started, so please stop looking at me like that.)
- Mabel getting to "do whatever she wanted" (re: destroy my house) while Ella had to do school work.
- Mabel making Matty laugh while Ella had to do school work. That's HER job.
Honestly, the first week went way better than I was anticipating. I know a lot of her frustration and tears came from the struggle against something new and big and full of change. I know that because my first born is so much like me in so many ways and the initial scariness of change tends to get the better of me most times, too (this really is an understatement, as Dan could probably tell you. COULD, but won't I'm
hoping guessing, because he's a saint who just rides out his wife's change induced fit storms like a champ).
One thing I wasn't expecting was the peace that came into the house once we had a schedule in place (peace obviously being a relative term here because A) Three year old and B) 11 month old). I don't know why I was surprised by this because schedules and organization are my jam, but both Ella and I relaxed into our roles relatively easily once we knew how the school day would look. Her and me, man. Schedules and repetitiveness and order speak to our souls.
Sometimes the down to our bones similarities Ella and I share actually make it harder for us to connect. I'm not particularly fond of admitting that, but it's the truth. And I was really nervous that me being her teacher would make that struggle even more apparent. But that didn't happen last week. In fact, the exact opposite happened. We got along better, understood each other, and had fewer snippity arguments. There were tears Every. Single. Day, but neither one of us ran away which is a really good argument for the existence of miracles, if you ask me.
I don't know if we'll always home school, but darn it if the first week didn't just try its best to beat every fear of it out of my head and heart.